Growing Kind Classmates, Together
Middle school is an exciting—and sometimes overwhelming—time. Students are figuring out who they are, where they fit in, and how to navigate friendships that can change quickly. One of the most powerful skills they can build during these years is kindness.
Kindness isn’t just about being “nice.” It’s about empathy, respect, inclusion, and the courage to stand up for others. When students feel safe and valued by their peers, they are more confident, more engaged in learning, and more willing to take healthy social risks—like joining a new club or speaking up in class. As a Capturing Kids' Heart campus, we all try to model these behaviors.
Here are a few ways you can encourage your child to be a kind classmate:
1. Talk About What Kindness Really Looks Like
Ask open-ended questions such as:
“What does a kind classmate do?”
“How can you tell when someone feels left out?”
“What could you do if you notice that?”
Help your child see that kindness includes:
Inviting someone to join a group
Listening without interrupting
Respecting differences
Standing up (safely) for someone who is being treated unfairly
2. Encourage Empathy
Middle schoolers are developing the ability to see things from another person’s perspective—but they still need practice. When your child shares a story about school, gently guide them to think about others involved.
For example:
“How do you think that student felt?”
“What might have been going on for them?”
Empathy helps students move from reacting to understanding.
3. Model Respect at Home
Children and teens notice how adults speak about others—neighbors, coworkers, teachers, even strangers. When we model respectful language and problem-solving, we show them how to handle disagreements thoughtfully.
It’s okay to disagree with someone. It’s not okay to be unkind.
4. Talk About Online Kindness
Much of middle school social life happens through group chats, social media, and gaming.
Remind your child that:
Words online have real impact.
Forwarding or liking hurtful content still causes harm.
If they wouldn’t say it face-to-face, they shouldn’t post it.
Encourage them to pause before sending messages and to reach out to a trusted adult if they see something concerning. Please be aware of what is being said to your child online as well as what they are saying to others.
5. Praise Specific Behaviors
Instead of general praise like “Good job,” try:
“I’m proud of you for inviting the new student to sit with you.”
“It took courage to speak up for your friend.”
Specific feedback reinforces the behavior you want to see again.
Even small actions can make a big difference.
Kindness doesn’t mean being perfect. Middle schoolers will make mistakes—that’s part of learning. What matters is helping them reflect, repair when needed, and keep growing.
When families and schools work together, we create a community where every child feels seen, valued, and respected. Thank you for partnering with us to nurture not just strong students—but strong human beings.
-Ms. Cheryl Hilser
Counselor
